So, I haven’t drank because I felt I needed to since Kalel died 5 years ago. It’s always been a want, which is different.

The need tends to come right around the point of drunk that I’m tired of reaching. The 8th, 9th, 10th beer of the night. Somewhere in there is the craving for one more before sleep. Which becomes one more, one more, one more.

It’s pretty hard to articulate, and harder to admit. Sitting down for A beer has never been a problem. I thoroughly enjoy it. It’s when I’m hammered that it’s a problem.

That said, tonight will be three days with out ANY amount of beer, which I’m not certain I’ve done in more than a year. So yeah. This is going to keep going.